A Red Team Whitewash

For the past two years in the undokai Cian has been a stalwart member of the White team, and for the past two years White team have been beaten by the Red team.
So, after intense negotiations and an undisclosed sum (but let us just say, it was a big sum; a big three figure sum. Oh yeah), Cian was transferred to the Red team for this year's competition. And yesterday the Red team were then utterly annihilated by the White team. It was in many ways reminiscent of the Dublin v. Galway match down in Tullamore. After the first three events of the morning White team had succumbed to the undokai equivalent of shipping three quick goals: they were beaten in the 50m, 80m, and 100m sprints. And that was before the horror show that was the tug of war. And don't get Cian started on the relay race...
The day had started so full of promise. Well, actually, it had started what sounded like a sustained salvo from the 16 inch guns on the battleship USS Iowa as the fireworks went off at 5:30 announcing that the undokai was 'good to go'. Which in turn meant a very bleary eyed Daddy had to hustle his still bed-warmed ass up to the school ground in order to secure a prime patch of sand from which to view the games. Given how things turned out I should really have stayed in bed. Somehow, ahem, I managed to miss the opening speeches but did get there for the "You will know us by our righteous fury" orations from the team leaders. Or rather blood curling whistles. As the video shows it was a bit like the trailer for the new Star Wars but without an old aged pensioner masquerading as Han Solo.

The events are divided up according to class grades which in turn are cleverly scattered over the course of the day so that people don't get up and leave once their kid's events are over. As I was only interested in 3rd class this meant I tuned out of much of the rest of the proceedings, though the human pyramid always has that 'will they fall and break bones?!' aspect to hold the viewer's interest.

For Cian first up was the 80m dash. The boy is a bit like the great Maurice Fitzgerald: you can't train nor tell him what to do; you just let him be and he'll perform for you on the day. And so it proved.

And yes, he was easing up with about 20 metres to go.
The tug of war followed. From the Red Team's point of view it should really have been called the 'tug of shame'. The event was staged twice and they lost both of them.

 We then had a musical interlude. A dancing musical interlude. It seems to be one of the prerequisites of Japanese primary school education that students learn how to move to the groove, even if the groove isn't particularly groovy. Looking back over Cian's school history to date it is striking how many instances there are of tripping the light fantastic. I mean, you'd never see that sort of behaviour in a scoil náisiúnta.
You can watch it, sorry, get your groove on here.

Onto the 'Hurricane'.
Initially, I thought this would be a revelatory tribute to the great Rubin Carter with perhaps a hair-raising acapella vocal rendition of Dylan's scintillating song (with a knowing look thrown towards the school principal when Cian snarls out the words "All of Rubin's cards were marked in advance, the relay trial was a pig circus he never had a chance"). But no. It was in fact a competition involving a long pole, running, jumping, and no, it wasn't a miniature version of the pole vault. It was something very ... Japanese, though its connection to a meteorological phenomenon and/or a terrible miscarriage of racial injustice remains unknown me. Suggestions, dear readers?

 
Then we had lunch.

Which induced a soporific stupor in pretty much everyone present. Matters weren't helped by the scheduling of a series of bizarre 'It's a Knockout!' (remember that?) style events in the afternoon. Note the distinct lack of enthusiasm amongst competitors and spectators both in the clip below.

And that marked the end of Cian's participation in the undokai. There were some other events but Daddy had brought a copy of the Economist with him and to be honest, the article on India's public-sector banks proved more enthralling.
At least the weather was good. Unlike the forecast for this weekend when Sanae's school is due to hold their undokai.