Stats

One of the nifty little features provided by those fine folk at blogger.com, home to this and countless other (equally unread) blogs, is the 'stats' function. This, as the name suggests, gives you statistical information on how many times your blog has been viewed (1209), what are the most popular entries (Festivals part 2), and, most entertainingly, who your audience are, or rather, what country they come from.

It makes for interesting and somewhat head-scratching reading.

From the statistics provided for the six month period from May to November of this year, Japan ranks first in audience numbers, as determined by the number of pageviews emanating from here, 464 in total. However, as most if not all of these can be accounted for by me either writing posts, editing posts, or satisfying my rampant ego by constantly checking to see if anybody has left any comments about my posts, it doesn't really count.

Next up is the United States with 213. Hello Ben, and perhaps Una too. There may be others, but like so many of their fellow country men and women, they are obviously the shy and retiring types.

In a somewhat embarrassing third place is Ireland, with 141 pageviews. Ostensibly home to my family and greatest number of friends, this relative indifference wounds. Or then again maybe I have hitherto not been aware of just how illiterate most of my Irish family and friends are. I'll try using less big words and maybe more pictures. Or get Cian to write the blog.

In fourth place is Germany with 54 views. I like Germany, the country, its people; I used to be able to speak the language passably and visited the country regularly during my formative years. But I am completely stumped as to who could possibly be reading this blog. I used to have some very good friends there, but I haven't, shamefully, been in touch with them for a long, long time, so I doubt it's them. Still, whoever you are, 'Wilkommen'.

In fifth place with 39 views is the UK. Obviously this is the Provost of Oxford University who is head hunting me for a Chair in Literature at All-Souls, albeit in a very leisurely and somewhat distracted manner, as befits an Oxford don.

Next up is, eh, Russia, with 30 pageviews. No doubt a considered geopolitical response to my insightful views on the 'Northern Territories Problem', an entry that has quickly become required reading for all post-graduate students as the prestigious Moscow Institute for Strategic Affairs.

Tied on 18 pageviews are, I kid you not, the United Arab Emirates and Turkey. It would seem I am a bit of a blogging powerhouse in the Middle East.

Finally, again tied on 11 pageviews apiece, are Brazil and the Netherlands. Whilst I admire their legendary soccer teams of the 1970's, I have no idea why anybody from their should be reading this. Maybe it is the dream of some boy growing up in the cobblestoned streets of Amsterdam or the favelas of Rio de Jainero to play for Muroran Otani soccer team.

Or maybe, as with so many others, they just typed in the wrong address.