Bits and Pieces

I meant to include these in my posts about Beijing but never got around to them at the time. First up is my plenary address to the AILA Conference where my spirited rendition of the 'ABC' song proved to be a huge hit, though I did have the odd tone-deaf heckler to contend with.

"Yes you, you at the back. Yeah, you with the brown eyes and the chopsticks. What did you just say? What?! Oh yeah, right, listen pal, like you can sing better. Yeah? No, not with my western leathered foot so far up your communist ass you'll be choking on my shoelaces...Oh yeah? You and who's army, Mr. Ming?....Oh, the People's Army you say, well, bring 'em on, bring 'em on..."

On our way back to Sapporo from Beijing our flight was delayed by nearly two hours as the pilot had to "negotiate" (read, 'haggle') with air traffic control for clearance to take off. This meant that by the time we arrived at Incheon airport in South Korea for our connecting flight to Sapporo, we had all of twenty minutes to make our connection.

But this is East Asia folks, where the concept of 'service' is as integral to society as rice consumption is. We were met at the gate by a representative of Korean Air holding a 'Sapporo: Flight KL 379' sign. There were three of us who needed to make that flight and once we were all assembled we began to move while Mr. Lee got on his walkie-talkie and arranged to have us 10-4ed through all the transfer passenger security checks. After that he layed on some more of his rubber-ducky magic and had them keep the gate open for us as we jogged through a crowded Incheon airport on a busy Sunday evening.

Made the flight. Get to Sapporo where we are met at the gate this time by a female JAL representative with a sign saying 'Gaynor Brian'.

"Honey, like countless women before you, I gotta tell you, much as you'd like it to, it's not going to happen. I'm married".

Which was met with a very Japanese "eh?". Turns out she was there to regretfully inform me that my suitcase had not made the connecting flight and would I accept their deepest apologies. And all this accompanied by deep bows and much wringing of hands and wailing of teeth. Or however it goes.

So as we made our wringing and wailing way to customs I filled in the necessary paperwork while Ms. JAL promised me they would courier my suitcase down to Muroran the very next day.

Which they did. Effortlessly.

Whereas last December when we went back to Ireland and our suitcases decided to take the long, slow scenic root from Amsterdam to Dublin, we had to go out to the airport, queue for two and a half hours and then search for our own luggage in the arrivals area.